This is more so for myself than anything else. I have so much going on in my life right now, and so much upcoming that I felt logging it somewhere outside of my OneNote Journal pages. A somewhat more organized documentation of what's happening. Will anyone read this? Doubtful. And I'm perfectly content with that.
My life has taken crazy twists in the past years, but the most important thing is where I am now.
So where am I now? Not in the geographical sense of course, but in the sense-of-self kind of way.
Last year, I discovered a passion and adoration for programming and game development. I tried to learn programming for game development in the past, but my interest and drive that admittedly started somewhat lackluster, tapered to a lame dribble and was inevitably forgotten.
What changed this time? Maybe it's my age showing, but quite honestly the thing that I think triggered the paradigm shift was my frustration with games that I tried to play. Every time I've played a game in recent years, I end up feeling let down by the flow of the game, or the mechanics not quite feeling right, or just design and gameplay choices that annoyed me more than anything. I kept thinking "This is how I would have done it!". After enough occurrences of experiencing those similar thoughts, I got fed up and experienced the ego-driven thought: "I can just do it myself better!".
Kidding--somewhat.
The real thought that drove my new passion was "I'll design a game that is perfect for me."
There's nothing inherently wrong with the games I've played and had gripes about it. Hundreds of thousands of people pick up those games and have zero issues with them. But after many years of gaming being the predominant hobby of mine and the one thing that I would sink hundreds of hours into on a yearly basis... I had become picky. My taste has soured by the fact that time has become so much more precious to me. It no longer seems worth it to commit hours of my time to something that isn't completely enjoyable.
So I started learning to code and develop games.
Aside from getting to the point of developing my 'perfect' (again, for me) game, I also have a strong desire to create tools and systems that will help others with similar struggles to what I face.
Mainly: Task management, time management, self accountability, and maintaining good habits lifestyle choices.
I'm currently developing a system to help myself out with those things.
I have ADHD and struggle heavily with self accountability... I am completely unable to self-manage modern daily life efficiently without aids. Between juggling chores, relationships, family, friendships, diet, exercise, personal wellness, keeping track of upcoming events and appointments, home to-dos, programming game development, programing software development, trying to start up an online jewelry store, working on my art, trying to carve out time for learning.... it's entirely too much for me to keep track of.
I've tried task management systems hobbled together. Nothing fits perfectly, and it's always been an amalgamation of 5+ different apps and systems at any one time to keep track of things. Even with those set up, it's still hard to get my easily distracted and forgetful ADHD brain to routinely keep track of that many systems. But it's what I had to manage them, and it was better than nothing.
So, I'm designing an all-in-one system for myself. I have the hope and dream that it will also aid others, once it's in a usable state. Designing this system is my current passion-focus. Game Development is also still present, but it's on the sidelines for now. The best thing I can do for myself right now, to improve my future time developing games, is to work on something that will aid future me's ability to manage a big project like game development.
A secondary passion-focus for me, is the work on a VR app that I've started. It's a treadmill app that let's you traverse through custom beautiful tailor-made scenes on your treadmill, walkingpad, stationary bike, etc. But I'll go more into that in a future post.
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